Ponderings...kickboxing and being fat

I'm going to kickbox class again tonight. I have NO coordination, but I'm hoping if I persist, it'll come to me. When I went last week there were only 3 other people there (men) and then my daughter and the instructor. It was 'ok' to be the fattest, most out of shape person there. I'm afraid that there will be more people there tonight...maybe people that don't have tolerance for someone like me. I have to go though, I have to do this for me.

I've lost around 40 pounds this past year and a half. I've done it very slow. Sometimes I'm committed, sometimes I'm more lax. I've lost though and that's a great thing. This morning I went into my closet to find something to wear to work. I hated everything I tried on. Most shirts hung off me and looked ridiculous. Some shirts are too short and I hate my stomach hanging out. I wonder if there'll come a time when I'm comfortable in my skin.
I guess I'm having a bad esteem day today. I need to change my attitude and kick it into gear. This is my year and I'm going to rise out of the ashes and shine! Let's go!

I would starve...to...death...

So, the hubster works in Tokyo. He tells me about the food there. Here in America, we're use to cooked meats...not so in Tokyo. Raw meat/fish is where it's at! hubster has eaten raw horse! *faint* I just can't see myself eating that. I might try raw fish (but damn), but I don't think I could eat raw horse or cow or any other mammal.
Hubster brought home a bunch of candies and other Japanese 'goodies'. The packaging is so fun. The packaging for the kids' candy is great! It's very colorful and has anime on it. So, my daughter was sitting all happy sampling all the different candies that Hubster brought home. You can't tell what it is, it's all written in Japanese...but tasting is fun... that is... until...she tasted this one candy. It looked like little flat square pieces of red taffy, only very thin. She pops one into her mouth and looks at me in distress (she's 17)... what in the world is it?? She gives me one to try! Oh.my.God. Horrible, horrible..horrible. No more of that. Hubster goes back to Japan, and asks one of his Japanese friends what that particular candy is - PICKLED OCTOPUS!!! Arrrgh!!
I think I'll stick to food products that are packaged in English. Yeah.

Missing him

Only 8 more sleeps until he's home. It's weird how I get use to my independence. I hope it's not weird for us when he comes back. He'll be back for a week..which is really too short. You just get use to each other again and it's time to be apart. I want to make sure that it still feels like his house too. I have to back off and let him be.
It will be nice to have my man back here to do the 'man' things...and I just just focus on the 'woman' things! ha :)

Housework is therapeutic

Yes, you heard me. Although those that know me know that I'd much rather stay home and leisurely clean my home that go to work. I made my kitchen sparkle today. And I made my toilet twinkle. There's definitely satisfaction in stepping back from a nice clean toilet. Yup, there is!!

soreness continues

So, my quads are killing me...more today than yesterday...after my little kickboxing experience. But it hurts so good!

Please go home!

Why do you come into the office if you're hacking all over the place, blowing your snotty nose, snifling, sneezing...did I mention hacking up a lung?? Give me a flipping break here!! It's pathetic.
Someone just shoot me now.

On quitting...

so...ummm...This person posted that it was good for me to quit smoking...he said he's quitting something...just not as serious....

http://rhinotillexomania.blogspot.com/


m'kay!

Kick boxing rules!!

I went last night and while it was very hard to keep up...I did a great job. The sensei was wonderful. He stayed right with me and taught me the moves that I needed to know. I have no balance or coordination, so this will take a great deal of work on my part.
I'm not as sore this morning as I thought I would be.
Another step in the right direction!!

I'm still QUIT!!

22 days, 9 hours, 43 minutes and 57 seconds smoke free.
426 cigarettes not smoked.
$77.57 and 3 days, 6 hours of your life saved.

Kick boxing

So, the plan is to go to my first kick-boxing class tonight. Rhiannon told me she'd go with me. I sure hope she doesn't back out. I'm nervous to go...I'm 50+ pounds overweight. I don't want to look like an idiot. Going to this class is very important to me and to the path that I am trying so hard to stay on. Finding the real me...being good to me. I'll post back and we'll see how the class went.

Another meat fast...

So last week's meat/egg fast resulted in a 5 pound loss...although I was bad over the weekend and I gained it all back. I'm doing the meat fast again this week. Why do I torment myself?? I just need to learn self-control. One day at a time Karen...

I'm such a quitter - I ROCK!!

15 days, 15 hours, 34 minutes and 12 seconds smoke free.
297 cigarettes not smoked.
$53.96 and 2 days, 6 hours of your life saved.

Meat fast

So, I'm trying to shake things up a bit...so I've started a 3 day meat/egg fast. You eat all protein (as lean as possible) for 3 days. Today is day 2. It's going pretty well, but I'll be glad when I can eat some veggies! I better lose some damn weight too! I'm not weighing until this thing is over...which is day after tomorrow! I made the mistake of weighing myself this morning...nothing. **rolleyes**
I'm going to have me a nice big Vodka and Seltzer when this is all said and done!!

And the award for biggest drama queen goes to.....

The bitch that I have to deal with almost daily. **roll eyes**
Nothing else to say...who knows if she'll end up reading this.
I just needed to get that off my chest. TYVM.

I need to get a life.

I lead a very boring existance. What do I do for fun?? I need to get out more or something! I have been lately, but for the most part, I go to work, come home, do housework, read, watch TV. I need to challenge myself, take a class or something. I've been looking inside myself a lot more now that Hubster is in Tokyo, and at 40, I'm just starting to figure out who I am. Isn't that crazy??

Look at my success so far!!

Time Smoke-Free: 9 days, 17 hours, 34 minutes and 8 seconds
Cigarettes NOT smoked: 185
Lifetime Saved: 1 day, 9 hours
Money Saved: $33.72

WOW!!!! Yay me!!

Welcome to 2005!

You do NOT need to bring your typewriter into the office and type documents. You can use the C O M P U T E R....you know, that thing on your desk that you use to play solitaire. Yes, you're over 50, but that's no excuse..... *sigh*